Emily Joy Allison-Hearn

Masturbation is a topic you might need to do a little extra work on defining your values around if you grew up in purity culture being told that it was a sin—and that’s especially true during the pandemic, when pleasurable touch from others is not always safe or accessible to us and self-care has become more important than ever as we try to process all the painful things happening in our world. Self-pleasure can be an extremely important aspect of self-care even during non-pandemic times, and right now that is especially true.

If you grew up steeped in purity culture, it can be easy to see pregnancy as an automatic punishment for any sexual behavior. Here's how you can counteract those beliefs.

Hello. I’m glad you’re here. I first just want you to know that I see you. I see you showing up here and maybe elsewhere, trying to learn, being open to new information and being willing to change and to grow. Intelligence, Stephen Hawking famously reminded us, is the ability to adapt to change. You’re smart, you’re doing your best and I believe in you. I know what it’s like to go your whole life being told one thing is true only to find out that actually, it isn’t. That’s happened to me so many times, on so many different topics, I’ve lost count. I know what it’s like to feel angry and disillusioned. I felt angry and disillusioned, too, when I began to realize that what I had been told about abortion was a lie.

I’m an HPV vaccine evangelist. Every opportunity I get, I stand on my metaphorical soap box and preach to everyone who will listen about why it’s so important to get vaccinated against HPV. But it wasn’t always like this.

Hey friend, Thank you for writing in with your question; I completely identify with the anxiety of searching for acceptance from your faith community when your life choices are at odds with religious dogma. It’s a hard place to be in. I want to say two things unequivocally that I think can both be...