Live Chat

This is a real-time chat, staffed and seen only by you and our staff and volunteers. 

It works just like an IM conversation or Facebook chat. You may also sometimes see the available chat icon outside of chat hours if and when staff are available for chat at times other than our set hours, and are welcome to come into chat anytime you see that icon.

Use chat for: Sex, sexuality, sexual⁠ (sexual: About or relating in some way to sex or sexuality.) health and relationship⁠ (relationship: An ongoing interaction or association with another person, place or thing.) questions, help, support and referrals. This service does require your immediate and full attention, so if you want to be able to come and go throughout a conversation, especially with lapses of several minutes, hours or days, or want to multitask, please use the boards or SMS service instead. 

Chat is unavailable
4/2/24 - 4/16/24. 
However our usual chat hours are:

If you want a chat at a time it isn't scheduled, you can always come to the message boards and see if any staff are available and ask. 

All of Scarleteen and its services are intended to expressly provide information, education and support within the scope of sex⁠ (sex: Different things people choose to do to actively express or enact sexuality and sexual feelings; often this involves genitals, but not always. ) and sexuality, sexual health and relationships. That means things like:

• sexual anatomy⁠ (anatomy: The body, parts of the body, or physical structure of organisms like people, animals or plants.) , body changes and body image⁠ (body image: Our sense, awareness and perception of our body in appearance and function as it relates to our sense of self.)
• partnered sex and masturbation⁠ (masturbation: Ways that people seek out and/or experience sexual pleasure by themselves, without a sexual partner.)
• sexual response and pleasure (or lack thereof)
• sexual health issues such as STIs/STDs, contraception⁠ (contraception: Devices, medications or behaviors used to intentionally aim to prevent pregnancy, including the condom, the cervical barrier, the implant, the patch, the pill, the rhythm method, the ring, the shot, the IUD, spermicide and withdrawal.) ( birth control⁠ (birth control: Any number of methods people use to intentionally prevent unwanted pregnancy, including the condom, the cervical barrier, the implant, the patch, the pill, the rhythm method, the ring, the shot, the IUD, spermicide and withdrawal.) ), abortion⁠ (abortion: A procedure to intentionally end a pregnancy before a birth. Miscarriage is also sometimes called "spontaneous abortion," even though it is usually not intended.) , finding sexual healthcare, and sex safety
• sexual and gender⁠ (gender: Characteristics that are seen or presented as distinguishing between male and female in a society. Gender may or may not include assigned or chosen: social roles, feelings, behaviors and/or presentation or appearance.) orientation or identity⁠ (identity: The defining character or personality of an individual; who we feel like we are as a person.) , including LGBTQA information and support
• relationships: dating, relationship models, casual sex, negotiation, communication⁠ (communication: Various ways we express ourselves to others, such as through speech, written words or symbols, sign language, body language, touch or art.) and agreements; managing conflict, breakups, choices; managing sexuality where it intersects with non-sexual friendships or family
• consent⁠ (consent: To freely and actively agree to do a specific thing with someone else with all the information about what that thing is, and the right to change your mind.) and sexual communication
• preventing, identifying and surviving sexual abuse, assault or harassment
• sexual ethics, activism and politics

What CAN'T Scarleteen's direct services help you with? (And where can you get help?)

• Scarleteen staff can and will not answer or engage with ANY questions or discussions stemming from or about pregnancy⁠ (pregnancy: The state of carrying a developing embryo or fetus within the uterus. Medically, someone is considered to be pregnant when an egg has been fertilized by sperm, cells divide, and the fertilized egg is implanted within the lining of the uterus.) fear or anxiety with people who are not pregnant or who are not or have not been otherwise directly involved with an actual pregnancy. For more on this recent policy change, what we CAN help with, and links to help with issues usually at the root of these fears, including anxiety and other mental health issues, click here.
• Medical emergencies or a medical evaluation, treatment or advice, such as a suspected or ongoing infection⁠ (infection: When harmful microbes, or germs, or harmful levels of microbes/germs, enter the body and multiply, causing illness. The common cold, flu viruses, sexually transmitted infections, chickenpox, impetigo, rabies and diphtheria are some kinds of infections.) , chronic pain condition or a sexuality issue, concern or problem that has come up related to or deeply impacted by a health condition where only someone very educated in your condition can consult. For help with those, see: An in-person healthcare provider via a clinic, hospital, or private practice. If you need help finding or accessing one, call your insurance provider if you are insured, or contact your state, country, provincial or city public health or social services office. Scarleteen can often provide support and additional information once you get a diagnosis and treatment, but we cannot diagnose any user nor provide or advise about treatment for any medical conditions. For online information about overall health or specific conditions, we suggest the Mayo Clinic, the NHS, or the World Health Organization.
• Ongoing mental health issues or conditions like anxiety disorders, clinical depression, bipolar disorder or persistent phobias, obsession or compulsion (including thoughts), or users stating they are at risk of harming themselves in any way. For help with those, see: A mental or general healthcare provider. For extra online support or information, you can check out⁠ (out: Short for ‘out of the closet’. When someone’s LGBTQ+ identity is known to other people.) the National Institute of Health, Mental Health, here, or Mental Health @ NHS Choices here. If you feel at risk of self-harm or suicide, calling 911 or a suicide hotline is the right next step.
• Those trying to conceive (trying to intentionally become pregnant). For help with that, see: An obstetrician/ gynecologist⁠ (gynecologist: (Pronounced guy-na-coll-o-jist) A doctor that specializes in the health of the uterus, ovaries, vagina, and vulva. . They may also be referred to as "OB/GYNs" or, informally, "gynos".) , midwife, doula, other fertility⁠ (fertility: The ability to become pregnant or other things having to do with becoming pregnant (eg, “the fertility clinic”).) /pregnancy educator, or a general healthcare provider. For online help and information, you can check out: Taking Charge of Your Fertility.
• Ongoing, persistent relationship or sexuality conflicts which have not been resolved over time and/or with help and coaching already provided by us via our direct services. For help with those, see: Your partner⁠ (partner: In a sexual context, a person with whom someone is having some kind of sex. The term "partner" can be used for all kinds of relationships, not just serious ones. "Partner" can also mean the person someone is with in a romantic or familial partnership.) . And yourself. Then your partner again. Then yourself. (AKA: communicate with each other and then make some decisions, y'all.) Or, you and your partner may need to consult with an in-person counselor, mediator or therapist.
• Abusive or dysfunctional family or partner situations where you are in immediate danger and need help. For help with those, see or contact: A domestic or interpersonal violence shelter, and/or your local social services department or agency. You may also call the police, or go to any hospital emergency room and ask for help. We can help with support around these issues once you are out of immediate danger, however, or help you find the appropriate help to get safe if you cannot find those shelters or services on your own.
• Legal advice. For legal help, see: A lawyer or contact your local legal aid service. Looking for age of consent⁠ (age of consent: The age at which a person is considered in law to be able to consent to sexual activity. Someone above this age who has sex with someone below it can often be charged with statutory rape, even if the younger person wants to consent.) laws and policies? Check out: Worldwide Ages of Consent @ Avert.
• Help or counseling for those who are currently perpetrating or have perpetrated emotional, physical or sexual abuse or assault. For help with that, see: A mental healthcare provider, such as a therapist or counselor. You can call local community centers or hospitals and ask about any available violence intervention programs which may be local to you. If you self-report any abuse or assault you have perpetrated to the police, you may also ask for counseling resources when you do. In the UK, this hotline is available for help for abusers. A similar service is available in the United States via the National Domestic Violence Hotline.
• Uterine scrying or other psychic services (in other words, "When will my period⁠ (period: The fluid – or flow – which contains blood, from the shedding of the uterine lining usually at the end of each menstrual cycle. Sometimes periods may be less fluid and more globby; this is the state that is often mistaken for blood clotting.) come?" "Am I pregnant?" "What is my boyfriend/girlfriend thinking?" For help with those, see: Waiting, in the case of waiting for a period. Or a home or clinical pregnancy test⁠ (pregnancy test: What we tell you to take when you ask us if you're pregnant. A test that can be done at home or by a healthcare provider to determine pregnancy. Usually a urine test, a pregnancy test measures for a specific hormone, hCG, only produced with pregnancy.) , to find out if you are pregnant. Or, your boyfriend or girlfriend, to find out what they are thinking, feeling or wanting, by asking them those things.
• Issues exclusive⁠ (exclusive: Something that is not divided or shared with others; which excludes others based on a given criteria.) to, or those which predominantly only impact, those over 30, such sex in long-term marriages, sex and aging, or post-menopausal issues. For help with those, see: Your general or sexual healthcare provider, your local library or bookstore, or a sex-positive sex toy store. For extra online support, you can check out sex-positive stores which include educational content or assistance, like Good Vibrations, Babeland or Early 2 Bed; or adult sexuality education; or research centers like the CSPH or the Kinsey Institute. For those seeking help with sex and sexuality issues over 50, see the AARP's excellent sexuality section.
• Any issues you may have at other websites, such as bullying or harassment, issues of differing information, lack of service, etc. For help with those, see: Those other websites. Look for a contact from at the website to contact an administrator, owner or moderator.