Readiness

How does a person explore sexuality, sexual identity or sexual interactions without feeling awkward? There are loads of things you can do!

The good news is that you do not have to be sexually active until you're ready. Virginity, aside from being an idea rather than a physical thing you can lose, is not something you need to race to "get rid of." There are no prizes for being the first person in your school to have sex, and no...

Then don't! Here's a feast of support and help for those who want to say no, not now, or not-like-this to sex or sexual relationships.

I'm just going to lay it down for you: sex will not be great unless you're mentally and emotionally prepared. But "prepared" means something different for everyone. For one person, it might mean a solid, committed relationship. For another, it might mean having overcome some body image problems. And for yet another, you might just genuinely feel ready right out of the gate. We all require different things in order to be truly prepared to have sex for the first time. Some of us might require a lot, and some might require almost nothing. Sex might have a lot of emotional or moral meaning for one person, but for another, it might have no such weight behind it at all.

I don't think there's anything wrong with you. But, boy howdy, does it sound like plenty was wrong with this situation. You did not WANT to engage in sex with this person. You were also clear that you didn't feel ready to have sex with this person once it was obvious to you that you felt that way...

People do say that people are ready for sex -- and not just the first time, either -- at different times, different ages and in different situations. And that's absolutely right. Whether we do or don't want any kind of sex at any given time, with any given person, in any given situation, and also...

The good news is our hormones don't control us. They can't override what choices we actually want to make, including when we're in our teens. I know, that might stand counter to a lot of what you hear about RAGING! TEENAGE! HORMONES! Super-powered chemicals that aspire to, if not world domination...

The only sound way we can tell if someone has or hasn't already had any kind of sex is by asking them and accepting their answer. Obviously, sometimes some kinds of sex can result in certain outcomes, like pregnancy or sexually transmitted infections, which can also tell us if someone has engaged in...

Intimacy is often awkward. And that isn't a bad thing. In some ways, I'd even say it's always awkward, in the sense that it's never really something that's exactly easy, especially when we're just starting to get intimate with someone, rather than when we have been for a long time. Getting and being...

Just because someone might want something from someone else doesn't mean it's right for that other person, either person, or that the time when they want it is the right time for it to happen. Few people in their early teens have a lot of what is needed in order to have healthy and satisfying sexual...